Don't even front like you put pants on, Logan
Now, y'all - just shut up and watch a few minutes of this.
http://youtu.be/FTEOpEGvcKA?t=1m
I tried to make it start a minute in. I am Lucy Retardo today. Just skip to a minute in.
I was your murdered neighbor and I came back to life and took this body that I'm now living in to play it.
Also, thanks for killing me. I have a way cuter nose now.
You wait so that bubbles form, which is what'll make 'em fluffy. You need to start watching Alton Brown like Daddy did. He explains the scientific reasons behind why you're doing that seemingly pointless thing you decide not to do because you don't know WHY.
The trick is that you need to not over-mix. Mix until you think, "shit, that's lumpy. that'll be a disaster." then stop. Wait a couple minutes. THEN pour onto your griddle. Promises.
Yeah, you can definitely make a manly pile of good breakfast foods.
Now. Tell Dave about what I can do with a skillet and steak, so he can shut his hoagie hole.