Assassin's Creed 4

[Joe]

ac5: no I didn't fucking want to jump that way! goddamnit! why did you jump off the ledge? i wanted you to jump up on top of the sign!

you might not think I like assassin's creed games...I do really. Well I've only played up to Brotherhood.

 

[Tarvis]

Joe, what do you do nowadays?

 

[Joe]

Basically I pick up the phone and call a motherfucker and ask him if he wants a job. Usually these jobs are super high level corporate positions that pay at least 10 times my salary.

I also do stuff like find who the relevant people are for said jobs. We're doing a search for the global CEO of [redacted because it's confidential and I'm not supposed to tell people but it's a big-ass company] soon...earning $10 million. Basic salary, without the trimmings. Yup. That, by the way, is a lot more than 10 times my salary!

It's alright.

 

[Joe]

Basically

 

[Tarvis]

When you moving back to the states?!

 

[Joe]

The year 2372

Give or take a couple decades

 

[Tarvis]

 

[Joe]

Yeah!

 

[scrappy]

Basically I pick up the phone and call a motherfucker and ask him if he wants a job. Usually these jobs are super high level corporate positions that pay at least 10 times my salary.

I also do stuff like find who the relevant people are for said jobs. We're doing a search for the global CEO of [redacted because it's confidential and I'm not supposed to tell people but it's a big-ass company] soon...earning $10 million. Basic salary, without the trimmings. Yup. That, by the way, is a lot more than 10 times my salary!

It's alright.

so basically abstergo (see how i brought the topic back to assassin's creed)

 

[Joe]

Yeah except unfortunately Kristen Bell don't work at my company.

 

[Tarvis]

There is always hope.

 

[scrappy]

Yeah except unfortunately Kristen Bell don't work at my company,

of course not. desmond stabbed the bitch.

 

[Joe]

That he did. That he did.

I kinda want me one of those hidden blades. It's all like shink!

The best counter-kill that Ezio does is that one with the hidden blades where he just stabs the dude really quickly like five or six times. It's rad.

 

[Joe]

I think we were on the subject of Kristen Bell

 

[Tarvis]

Too bad she married one of the worst people alive.

 

[Lulu]

lmao at travis with the super dunk

 

[Joe]

I have no idea who she married

 

[Lulu]

Dax Sheppard, isnt it?

 

[Joe]

Dunno who that is!

After looking at wikipedia: lol still dunno!



Shepard.

 

[Joe]

Because I can't hear the name Shepard without going "Shepard....Wrex." in my head.